Why Parents Should Learn to Trust Their Gut Instinct
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Photo: opalandtheidiot / Creative Commons
I've written before how the glut of information available to us these days can make trusting our parental instinct difficult. How do we know when it's better to go with our gut as opposed to trusting information presented to us?
Last week on Motherlode, Blogger Carolyn Russell wondered if it was right to trust her gut instinct when it came to choosing a daycare. The daycare she ultimately chose gave her a better feeling, but it also had more state-documented violations than the daycare she rejected.
She received many reader comments that told her not to worry, that trusting her gut was the right thing to do. I'm not sure she trusted her gut, exactly, as she described the undesired daycare as a "dirty, disordered place" that she expected to be forcibly shuttered. It sounds to me like Russell is confusing "following her gut" with using information that she collected through observation.
So I would argue that Russell made her decision based on the facts that she herself had gathered, as opposed to trusting the state's partially informed assessment.
Gut Instinct, or Qualitative Data?
Throughout a parent's life, there are many opportunities to worry about whether the correct decisions are made. Sometimes we think that we're flying in the face of cold, hard facts and making choices that oppose the reality of a situation based on a vague feeling.
Keep in mind that there are two kinds of data: qualitative and quantitative. It's easy to think that quantitative data is harder to argue with, since there is a subjective element to data that's qualitative.
But our own subjective reality is the one that we have to live with as parents. So looking for information that we can judge and assess based on our personal feelings and preferences can actually make our choices more relevant to our lives and the quality of our children's experience.
The next time you find yourself wrestling with a decision based on your "gut" versus data, remember that your own instinct actually provides you with a valuable source of legitimate information.
Related Articles on Parenting:
Is This Generation of Parents More Thoughtful, or Just Plain Neurotic?
Mother Convicted of Vehicular Homicide After Son Dies While Crossing the Street with Her
Choosing a Daycare/Pre-School? Don't Look Too Far
